Saturday, August 14, 2010

No turning back..

Tried as I may, I couldn't bluff myself anymore that this is what I really want to do. No, construction related stuff is not my thing. It's too late to sigh now though. I envy people who has the courage to turn back and change the course they took when they are already so near the finishing point, just because they didn't want to reach the finishing point at all. No, I can't bluff anymore. How I skived so much during intern and learned nothing at all should have said as much. How just the thought of writing that damned report sends me to a bout of depression needs no further explanation. No, I do not hate writing report in general, just that bloody report- because I have no idea what I have learned so far.

If I can't be happy about my studies now, how can I be happy when I started work later? nothing else matters to me now. How I wish I could just put everything behind me and just run away. Far far away and never stopping, never turning back, never have to face all these again.

But this is not an ideal work. I can't just turn around and run away..

1 comment:

chareli said...

the thing about changing is that it's not easy. you're wasting time, not to mention money as well. if you don't mind both, then it's ok. i do wish that everyone could do a job that they liked but that only exists in the ideal world lah. hmmm. the thing is though, your job is not stagnant. you should try it out first and then later on be the judge whether you want to continue doing that or not. i know that many people change jobs half way, like 180 degrees difference from the original job. what i'm just saying is that... it's not the end. you can always reinvent yourself.